Chapters: 001 Word Count: 1329
Character(s): Abbey Bartlet, CJ Cregg, John Hoynes
Category(ies): Missing Scene
Pairing(s): CJ/Hoynes, CJ/Abbey, Abbey/Hoynes
Episode(s): 5-15 Full Disclosure
Crossover Shows: - No Show -
Summary: "Well, that day (in my life) never should have taken place,
'cause this day in my life still cannot explain
Why I listened in the first place to you..." -Poe, That Day
Author Notes: Missing scene- Full Disclosure. Abbey and CJ have a heart-to-heart. Rated TEEN just to be safe.
CJ/Abbey, CJ/Hoynes, Abbey/Hoynes, and a bit of CJ/Toby for fun.
I don't own the characters, I just play with them and put them back.
“Well, that day (in my life) never should have taken place,
‘cause this day in my life still cannot explain
Why I listened in the first place to you…” -Poe, That Day
Abbey raps on CJ’s office door, fully intent on giving her a lecture on the benefits of sleep. When CJ doesn’t answer the door, Abbey thinks she’s already left and turns to head back to her own office. A few steps down the hall, she hears laughter coming from CJ’s office. The first lady is secretly happy that the Press Secretary hasn’t gone home, because they haven’t been spending much time together and Abbey wants to put the whole clinic thing behind them. But CJ’s still gonna get the lecture. Abbey makes her way back to CJ’s door, knocking hard enough to be heard over whoever CJ’s talking to.
Inside the office, CJ bids goodbye to Ben and walks to the door. The smile on her face falters a bit when she sees the first lady, but CJ’s careful to hide her dismay. Abbey, not having been born on the turnip truck last night, picks up on CJ’s less than jovial mood and walks into the office nonetheless. “Mrs. Bartlet, I wasn’t expecting to see you so late.”
Abbey takes a seat on CJ’s couch, making sure to leave the other woman enough room to sit beside her like they always do when having a late-night chat. CJ walks over to lean against the front of her desk, and Abbey feels like she’s been slapped in the face. “Are you still pissed off at me for practicing medicine again, CJ? God, I’m a doctor. I’m helping at a free clinic… children don’t care that I secretly treated my husband, and I’m pretty sure their parents don’t, either.”
“I swear to God, Abbey, if you’ve come here to start something… I am in no mood for this! I’ve had a pretty shitty day and all I want to do is go home, pop a movie in, eat a pint of ice cream and go to bed!” Abbey can hear the desperation in the other woman’s voice and is surprised to see tears streaming down the usually stoic face of the administration. “CJ, I didn’t come here to start something. I came here to talk to you, because we used to be closer and I miss that. I had no idea today was that bad. What happened?”
CJ hastily wipes her eyes, annoyed at herself for breaking down in front of the boss’s wife. “It’s nothing, Abbey, really. I just came face-to-face with a demon from my past and it brought back some…feelings.” Abbey thinks back on everything Jed told her happened today while she was at a party for the Daughter’s of the American Revolution. Something about Chinese bras and American cars, the school voucher thing, the Base Closing Commission…. “John Hoynes?”
Abbey sees CJ straighten at the name of the former vice president. “What did Hoynes do this time?” CJ turns her back to Abbey, not wanting the other woman to see the anguish in her eyes. She can’t seem to keep it from seeping into her voice, though. “Abbey, please, I can’t talk about this.” The first lady walks up to CJ, putting a hand on her shoulder to turn her around. “You need to talk to someone, CJ. Whatever happened, keeping it bottled up inside won’t help you.”
CJ nods, walking over to the couch and sitting with her head in her hands. Abbey follows the younger woman and joins her on the couch. “It happened ten years ago,” CJ began. “I was at a fundraiser. My ex showed up with his new bride…John was there. He was so smooth and kind, kept bringing me drinks and telling me what a fool my ex had been to leave me. I knew John was a dangerous man. I knew he was married, but that, if it came to it, I wouldn’t be able to tell him no. He was so…magnetic. My ex watched me follow John onto the elevator. Up until this moment, he was the only person who ever knew that I slept with a married man.”
CJ’s voice breaks at the admission, fresh tears falling from her pale eyes. “Oh, CJ.” CJ wipes the tears from her eyes, angry at herself for letting John Hoynes get to her all these years later. “Sweetie, John Hoynes is good a finding a woman’s weakness and working it to his advantage. I’m sure you’re not the only woman to fall into his trap. In fact, I know you’re not.”
CJ’s head snaps up when she hears Abbey’s confession. “It was about twelve years ago. I had just caught Jed in an affair. We fought about it, he said he’d end it, and that was that. About a month later, we were still fighting. I went to a fundraiser he couldn’t attend, and John was there. He picked up on the fact that things were a bit rocky between Jed and I, and he just… he was very sweet, offering me his shoulder to cry on. By the end of the night, it was over. I was in his room, feeling broken and ashamed of myself. Even after what Jed had done…I couldn’t bring myself to tell him, CJ. It would break his heart.”
Abbey wipes a tear from her eye with a self-deprecating laugh. “Well, isn’t this fun? I should let you get home.” Abbey stands to go, but CJ calls her name. “Do you know what the worst part is?” Abbey turns to CJ, waiting for the younger woman to continue. “I’d do it again in a heartbeat. Not John, of course, but there is someone… someone who’s married.”
CJ jumps up from the couch and crosses the room to her desk, leaning against it once more. Sitting that close to Abbey Bartlet in this mood was a very dangerous thing. Abbey sits for a moment, processing what her husband’s Press Secretary just said. Finally understanding the meaning by the words, she stands and crosses the room to stand in front of CJ. “So would I, CJ. So would I.”
With a sigh, CJ leans down to capture Abbey lips in a kiss. Abbey pulls her closer, pressing her body fully against CJ’s lithe form. The two women pull apart moments later, gasping for air. Abbey gently tucks a strand of CJ’s hair behind her ear. “But I won’t do it, CJ. Not with you. There’s a difference between love and lust. I gave into my lust for John Hoynes, but I love you and I will not make you the other woman. It won’t always be like this… After we leave the White House… If you still want me, then we can make a go of it. But not until Jed’s presidency is over.” Without another word, Abbey turns and leaves the younger woman alone in her office, hurting more than she had when Abbey found her.
But the first lady had meant what she said. Once they all left Washington, her marriage was over. The magic they once shared had been destroyed by this job, and Abbey’s heart had found another. The next few years would be unbearable, but now she knew that she could handle it, because her feelings were reciprocated. They would be together one day, and neither of them would have to feel guilty about it.
“Tomorrow’s coming ‘round a hairpin curve in the road,
She’s got a run in her stocking and she’s missing the heel of her shoe.”